I really liked the pictures that you posted on your Home and Introduction pages. I think the pictures matched the theme and the feel of your introduction really well. I thought that the first three to five sentences of your introduction were really great at catching my attention. They were dark and captivating which is a great way to start out so that the reader knows what they are getting into. It might have just been me, but I was kind of confused by the last two paragraphs. I reread the story a few times, but still found the last part confusing. I think that you just need to maybe add a few sentences in to explain more who Reynard and Foxy are. The first two paragraphs are very detailed which is great! The background and layout of your website is also very nice! I think it really ties into the theme and what you are trying to accomplish with your story! I look forward to reading the rest of your storybook when it is finished! You did a really good job with it so far! Good luck!
Your cover page for your story book really sets a mysterious and dark tone. Everything being black and white makes it seem old or maybe like it is set a long time ago. The picture of the fox in the snow in general is just a really cool picture, and even before reading anything about the story it suggests something interesting about animals in the city. The font color also being gray just adds to the gloominess and mystery of the page. If you did not want it to be so gloomy, I think that by adding just a little bit of color to the font would make a big difference. However, it may end up looking kind of Sin City style.
On the introduction page, the black and white mystery theme continues to be strengthened with that picture of a saint Bernard that looks like a freeze frame from Cujo. Now that I have actually read part of the story, I would say that your background picture is dead on. However, even though it is fitting to your old detective story theme, I think that the gray on gray on gray is coming off as a bit lazy. As for the story itself, it seemed very interesting and well written. I enjoyed the joke that was not really a joke and the way that the narrator used that to give more details about the setting of Aesop. Overall great job, but I still vote for some red lettering and Sin City.
Hi Cody! I just wanted to thank you for you comment on my sTorytelling about Adam and Eve back during the second week of school! I'm glad you told me that I made you think of the story in a different light by how I wrote it. That was my goal! Thank you for helping me reach it!
Hey Cody, first of all, I wanna say great choice on both the background photo for the theme of your storybook and the cover page photo. The background photo of the city gave me the perception of a busy subway during rush hour with people rushing all around. I am a big fan of the photo on your cover page. The fox brings a sense of serenity that has a calming effect when looking at it. I am also a fun of your color scheme. I like how just using black and white colors attach a vintage feel to whatever you are doing. Like you, I chose a black and white theme for my storybook. Interesting enough, I also use animals in my stories. I thought your narration style was great, you do a good job in connecting with the reader. Beyond that I enjoyed the way you progressed to the description of the story we are about to read next. You set Sheriff Bernie to be someone with a lot of grit and wisdom. I am excited to see why Reynard is running from Bernie. Anyways, I liked how you created both your cover page and your introduction and am interested to see the end result!
The black and white theme you use throughout your blog is very visually appealing. I wonder if you will use any of those 1 color pictures to bring out something truly special about a photograph. I enjoy the tone that the black and white matched up with the narrator's personality provide. It is an excellent combination for the reader.
Your cover page was excellent. After reading the introduction I understand the watchdog theme portrayed. The background also gives the reader the feel for the location, as if the watchdog is watching over an entire city.
The introduction was very well written. The background on the cover page shows a large city and a regular dog, which seems like an impossible task for one dog. However, we quickly learn that your Sheriff Bern is no ordinary beast. The analogies that the narrator uses to describe the entire scenario are great for a humor aspect as well as setting the tone for the entire storybook. I think that your introduction could use one last sentence, saying something along the lines of: "Just another day on the job for Sheriff Bern," or perhaps something more flowery or another anecdote. I thought you did a great job and look forward to the stories you add to your storybook!
Hello! I would like to start by saying that the overall design of your storybook was very well thought out and visually appealing. The cover page was great and made me want to read more! Next I would like to discuss your first story! Wow, I really like the tone you set with your introduction. I like how casual your language is, it makes it very relatable and helps keep the reader's attention. I think if you can carry this tone out throughout the rest of your stories, that you will see a positive response from that. One thing that left me wondering though, is what are the other stories you will be telling. Most people introduced those stories in their introduction. I don't know if possibly I missed it, but that would be an important component that I would consider adding if I were you. Overall I think you're on a great track and I look forward to reading more from you!
Cody, I like what you did with your topic, it is a very clever idea that lets you mix and match Aesop fables very easily. Your introduction almost reminds me of Who Framed Roger Rabbit, where a disgruntled narrator lives with all of these wacky characters. As a suggestion, I would introduce your characters before you give the reader their name. When I was reading, I was somewhat lost when you added Reynard with little information about him until the next paragraph. Your description of Bern was very good and I am assuming you are going to write around him for your story telling. I just wish you had finished the next section because I would really like to see where you go from the introduction. Good Job.
I love everything about your storybook. I love how everything is in black and white, even the gorgeous pictures! I feel like I am sneaking around the old city of New York, watching the animal Mafia in action and I have to be careful or Bern is going to snatch me up! The only thing in the Intro that I noticed was that at the end you talk about "Foxy" but then you call him Reynard (and I love that name!). I get that he is a fox but I can't tell if his name is Fox or Reynard... If you could just clear that up it would be spotless!
I am so excited to read your storybook as it goes. You set up the seen for an old, black-and-white mobster movie so well I can almost see it happening. When I picture Reynard, I know he is a fox, but I always picture Rocket from Guardians of the Galaxy. Your writing is perfect to make me feel like I was sent back in time. I could sit here and rave about your storybook for way too long... I am going to go and just anxiously await the next story!
Hey Cody! With this being the first time that I am visiting your page, I was very impressed with the look and feel of your storybook cover page! I really like that you went with a black and white theme and placed a large focus on the city aspect of your City of Animals.
I thought that you had a very interesting introduction that had a very real-world feel to it versus the fun fluffy little animals many people have envisioned dangerous four legged creatures to be. I really like that you used the introduction to form a story in itself and yet still let it be informative enough to give us a glimpse into what your future stories will be about.
I thought that your first story was a very entertaining read! I love that you completely transformed the original story into something more modern in terms of the police interrogation and it being in a city atmosphere. I also thought that it was interesting that you chose to keep the fox alive "at least so far" so that you could actually incorporate the interrogation into the story and let us see what the fox has to say for himself!
Overall, I think that your storybook idea is very fun and creative and was very fun for me to read! I love that you are keeping true to the black and white images as well!
I LOVE your picture on the main page. Foxes are my favorite animal of ever. I also really like your introduction. I like that you start out with a joke, but then you blatantly end it with a serious note. I liked your reference to popular movies like Lion King and Wizard of Oz, I thought those were really clever. Your dog in the introduction reminds me of a story of a dog acting as sheriff, I think, from when I was much younger, but I can’t remember what it was called. I think his name was Hank? I like the picture of Bern, I thought it really showed the character you described as far as the seriousness and cool demeanor. It also gave a crime-fighting, serious, mysterious feel to the stories following and the character of Bern. I like your use of simile and descriptions. Your description of Aesop kind of reminded me of Gotham city prior to Batman, if that makes sense. Especially when you say that the true king is the lion (crime) just like in Gotham. The “sit” line from Bern and the rebuttle from Reynard made me laugh. I really liked that. I can’t wait to hear what happened and see if the fox survives his encounter!
I love the entire setup of your site! The grey tones makes this so relaxing and the image you chose is very sweet. I think upon first inspection, you have really brought together a nice color scheme. Your introduction is very well written and I love that you started it off the way you did with the joke. I feel as if you really capture our attention that way and it made it possible for you to lighten the mood a little bit despite the introduction being very serious. I can just imagine this big dog being the main character too! I love the fox's character development in your first story. The police investigation helps continue your introduction in a good direction and I really think you have used a lot of creativity in your storybook! I can tell you have put a lot of thought into this story because the author's note helps us understand that you have twisted the original and kept the fox alive! I think having a survivor really helps the development of the investigation.
I feel as if the Fox could be developed into an even more smart aleck type character in his responses. Overall, I loved this story and I am really looking forward to coming back to see what else you have in store for us!
Cody, great job on your storybook so far! My first impression of the grayscale theme was that it gave the site an old-timey kind of feel, but as I started reading, I also got a gloomy sense about it too. Your color scheme choice does a lot to emphasize the underlying darkness in this city of animals and highlights the parts of this town that aren't all "giggles and funnies."
In terms of your writing, I was very impressed. You gave just the right amount of background for the reader to know what's happening, but not so much that it is overbearing--there are still aspects that are open to interpretation. Your intro provided just enough of a cliffhanger to make me excited to read more. In your first story, I loved the way that you changed the fable to fit this modern setting while keeping the crucial details. You also constructed the banter between the fox and the dog in a smart way--the character development of both the tough sheriff and the sly fox are coming along nicely. One thing I did think, however, was that this chapter ended pretty abruptly. I also wondered if you were going to add the morals of the original fables to the end of each chapter—perhaps this would provide either a smooth transition into the next story or a more conclusive ending.
Overall, great job so far! I can’t wait to come back and read more of your work.
Wow! Your introduction was really good! The narrative flowed well and the narrator was interesting, describing the world in which the characters live in. And he (I’m assuming it’s a he) did a great job of giving a lot of information about the world without awkwardly forcing the information on the reader. He seemed like the type of character who knows everything about everything going on in the town. By the way, I think the concept of the city of Aesop is awesome. It’s really unique, and allows you to do a lot with your storybook. As for your writing in general, I like the style. Not only does it sound natural, it’s also funny, what with the narrator’s sarcasm.
As for your first story, I thought it was awesome! You have so much detail (but definitely not in a bad, purple prose sort of way), which made it easy to visualize the scene playing out in front of me. And I like how even in a fairly serious situation, you manage to inject your humor into the story. As in the introduction, the writing flows well and the dialogue is organic. I had no idea how the story was going to play out – I thought that the fox committed the crime and was going to get arrested until he revealed the lion killed the donkey.
Anyways, I think you did a great job overall! Can’t wait to check out your later stories!
Hi Cody, I have yet to visit your storybook this semester. I loved the black and white color scheme on your home page. I have read another classmates storybook over the Tales of Aesop so I was interested to see how you delivered your stories. Your introduction was a lot different than I thought. I was not sure what to expect but your introduction was very intense! I think it is neat that you have a dog as the sheriff ruling over the lions and other animals. Your first story, “A Trip to the Pound” was just as intense as the introduction. I was on edge the whole time wondering what the fox was going to say about the murder. It’s an interesting plot that the Lion has an underlying authority with the animals of the city. I like that the black and white theme continues throughout the storybook and that all of the pictures are also in black and white. It really has a true feel of a murder mystery movie with the language used and the color. Great job on portraying such a deep theme and I am looking forward to reading more stories in your storybook to see what happens to the fox!
First off, I have to say that I am really impressed with the set up and layout of your cover page! It works perfectly with your title, and I cannot wait to being reading the introduction and first tale.
So maybe I have been watching way too much television lately, but the sort of vibe that your narrator has set up kind of reminds me of the rough-and-tough layout of Gotham, on the show Gotham of course haha. This makes me all the more intrigued to learn more of Sheriff Bern, and his interactions with the animals in the city of Aesop. Growing up I have always loved reading mysteries, and the way your story is written really pulls me in as a reader all while keeping me in anticipation to what's going to happen next.
After reading all of your first story, I have to applaud you for all your creativity that you have implemented! I cannot wait to come back and read more of your stories, and wonder whether Sheriff Bern is able to catch and bring down Lion. The fact that you were able to turn a simple fable into a murder mystery is just simply amazing! Great job so far!
I'm already in love with your storybook. Maybe I'm way ahead of myself, but the introduction is written in such a way that I imagined jazz and a deep voice. This may be my favorite line of any storybook: "no Chihuahua was going to be telling the tiger who he can and who he can’t eat for dinner, if you catch my drift." I think I'm gushing too much here.
This very much reminds me of the comic Fables. It makes me want to know more about the city of Aesop. Do humans live in surrounding cities? Do humans know about the city? Do humans even exist in this world you've created? As much as I want to know these things, the mystery surrounding it is really fun too. It definitely gives off a more surreal vibe when you don’t mention humans.
As far as the layout goes, I think you did a fantastic job. I was confused at first when I got to your cover page. I thought a storybook about Aesop’s fables would be more vibrant and childish. But once I read the introduction, I realized how perfect it is. Your writing is also excellent! I didn’t find any typos or weird spots. Everything is clear and cleverly written. I’m definitely going to be back to read the second story!
For starters, I love your introduction. Your "Wizard of Oz" and "Lion King" references are priceless! I also think it is really clever to name it town Aesop. Bernie sounds like a really interesting character! Definitely a better sounding cop dog than your average chihuahua. I would like to know some back ground on him! What made him such a hard cop? I really love your writing style! You brought me right into the story and I loved it.
I was shocked to hear that the fox was in trouble for murder! I thought they were traditionally tricksters in Aesop's fables, not a cold blooded killer! I was glad to hear that he did not kill the Donkey. Your description of the police station was pretty good as well. I am glad you made it kind of run down, it definitely seems to fit better into your story than a newer one would. However, now I would really like to know what despair smells like. Your interrogation scene was really great. I have seen plenty of investigative tv shows and that seemed pretty spot on! I absolutely love what you have done with your storybook! One of my favorites so far! I would love to come by and see what you have done with it later this semester!
Hi again Cody, Fantastic job with your first story, it is one of the coolest transformations of the source material into a storybook I have seen so far from the internet reading assignments. You made this story much more memorable the way you added a substantial amount of depth and plot to the pretty plain source material. Your characters are also very well written. I was concerned last time that your introduction did not develop your characters and left the reader confused but the back story you put forward makes them very well-rounded characters. I also like how you made the story feel connected. If I remember correctly from reading the Aesop section that the stories are all not really connected but your telling has a very good flow to it and I can not wait to see how you tie in your next story.
I also did not mention it last time I commented but your choice of theme and background also does your story justice because it accentuates the dark, gritty feel that you are going for in your story. I like how the background pic looks like a gritty old New York mobster movie from the forties.
Hey Cody! I remember looking at your storybook when it was still only a cover page and an introduction and was very impressed with your direction! Because of that, I was excited to have the opportunity to revisit your storybook this week and see how it has progressed. Unfortunately, I was a little disappointed to only find one story to read this week!
For your story I thought that you do an excellent job of depicting each of your character's personalities! I love that you really expanded on the relationship between the dog and the fox from the original story in way that was very entertaining and kept me wandering what was going to happen next. I think that your storybook is very imaginative and has a great writing style that flows well and is easy to follow along with! I hope that you get the chance to squeeze in a few more stories for me to read before the semester is up!
Cody, thanks for reading my storybook for a second time and letting me know what you liked about the stories. Quoting your favorite Doctor line showed me that I was doing a good job when coming up with odd, clever things for him to say in the stories. Thank you!
I really liked the pictures that you posted on your Home and Introduction pages. I think the pictures matched the theme and the feel of your introduction really well. I thought that the first three to five sentences of your introduction were really great at catching my attention. They were dark and captivating which is a great way to start out so that the reader knows what they are getting into. It might have just been me, but I was kind of confused by the last two paragraphs. I reread the story a few times, but still found the last part confusing. I think that you just need to maybe add a few sentences in to explain more who Reynard and Foxy are. The first two paragraphs are very detailed which is great! The background and layout of your website is also very nice! I think it really ties into the theme and what you are trying to accomplish with your story! I look forward to reading the rest of your storybook when it is finished! You did a really good job with it so far! Good luck!
ReplyDeleteYour cover page for your story book really sets a mysterious and dark tone. Everything being black and white makes it seem old or maybe like it is set a long time ago. The picture of the fox in the snow in general is just a really cool picture, and even before reading anything about the story it suggests something interesting about animals in the city. The font color also being gray just adds to the gloominess and mystery of the page. If you did not want it to be so gloomy, I think that by adding just a little bit of color to the font would make a big difference. However, it may end up looking kind of Sin City style.
ReplyDeleteOn the introduction page, the black and white mystery theme continues to be strengthened with that picture of a saint Bernard that looks like a freeze frame from Cujo. Now that I have actually read part of the story, I would say that your background picture is dead on. However, even though it is fitting to your old detective story theme, I think that the gray on gray on gray is coming off as a bit lazy. As for the story itself, it seemed very interesting and well written. I enjoyed the joke that was not really a joke and the way that the narrator used that to give more details about the setting of Aesop. Overall great job, but I still vote for some red lettering and Sin City.
Hi Cody! I just wanted to thank you for you comment on my sTorytelling about Adam and Eve back during the second week of school! I'm glad you told me that I made you think of the story in a different light by how I wrote it. That was my goal! Thank you for helping me reach it!
ReplyDeleteHey Cody, first of all, I wanna say great choice on both the background photo for the theme of your storybook and the cover page photo. The background photo of the city gave me the perception of a busy subway during rush hour with people rushing all around. I am a big fan of the photo on your cover page. The fox brings a sense of serenity that has a calming effect when looking at it. I am also a fun of your color scheme. I like how just using black and white colors attach a vintage feel to whatever you are doing. Like you, I chose a black and white theme for my storybook. Interesting enough, I also use animals in my stories. I thought your narration style was great, you do a good job in connecting with the reader. Beyond that I enjoyed the way you progressed to the description of the story we are about to read next. You set Sheriff Bernie to be someone with a lot of grit and wisdom. I am excited to see why Reynard is running from Bernie. Anyways, I liked how you created both your cover page and your introduction and am interested to see the end result!
ReplyDeleteThe black and white theme you use throughout your blog is very visually appealing. I wonder if you will use any of those 1 color pictures to bring out something truly special about a photograph. I enjoy the tone that the black and white matched up with the narrator's personality provide. It is an excellent combination for the reader.
ReplyDeleteYour cover page was excellent. After reading the introduction I understand the watchdog theme portrayed. The background also gives the reader the feel for the location, as if the watchdog is watching over an entire city.
The introduction was very well written. The background on the cover page shows a large city and a regular dog, which seems like an impossible task for one dog. However, we quickly learn that your Sheriff Bern is no ordinary beast. The analogies that the narrator uses to describe the entire scenario are great for a humor aspect as well as setting the tone for the entire storybook. I think that your introduction could use one last sentence, saying something along the lines of: "Just another day on the job for Sheriff Bern," or perhaps something more flowery or another anecdote. I thought you did a great job and look forward to the stories you add to your storybook!
Hello! I would like to start by saying that the overall design of your storybook was very well thought out and visually appealing. The cover page was great and made me want to read more!
ReplyDeleteNext I would like to discuss your first story! Wow, I really like the tone you set with your introduction. I like how casual your language is, it makes it very relatable and helps keep the reader's attention. I think if you can carry this tone out throughout the rest of your stories, that you will see a positive response from that. One thing that left me wondering though, is what are the other stories you will be telling. Most people introduced those stories in their introduction. I don't know if possibly I missed it, but that would be an important component that I would consider adding if I were you. Overall I think you're on a great track and I look forward to reading more from you!
Cody,
ReplyDeleteI like what you did with your topic, it is a very clever idea that lets you mix and match Aesop fables very easily. Your introduction almost reminds me of Who Framed Roger Rabbit, where a disgruntled narrator lives with all of these wacky characters. As a suggestion, I would introduce your characters before you give the reader their name. When I was reading, I was somewhat lost when you added Reynard with little information about him until the next paragraph. Your description of Bern was very good and I am assuming you are going to write around him for your story telling. I just wish you had finished the next section because I would really like to see where you go from the introduction. Good Job.
I love everything about your storybook. I love how everything is in black and white, even the gorgeous pictures! I feel like I am sneaking around the old city of New York, watching the animal Mafia in action and I have to be careful or Bern is going to snatch me up! The only thing in the Intro that I noticed was that at the end you talk about "Foxy" but then you call him Reynard (and I love that name!). I get that he is a fox but I can't tell if his name is Fox or Reynard... If you could just clear that up it would be spotless!
ReplyDeleteI am so excited to read your storybook as it goes. You set up the seen for an old, black-and-white mobster movie so well I can almost see it happening. When I picture Reynard, I know he is a fox, but I always picture Rocket from Guardians of the Galaxy. Your writing is perfect to make me feel like I was sent back in time. I could sit here and rave about your storybook for way too long... I am going to go and just anxiously await the next story!
Hey Cody! With this being the first time that I am visiting your page, I was very impressed with the look and feel of your storybook cover page! I really like that you went with a black and white theme and placed a large focus on the city aspect of your City of Animals.
ReplyDeleteI thought that you had a very interesting introduction that had a very real-world feel to it versus the fun fluffy little animals many people have envisioned dangerous four legged creatures to be. I really like that you used the introduction to form a story in itself and yet still let it be informative enough to give us a glimpse into what your future stories will be about.
I thought that your first story was a very entertaining read! I love that you completely transformed the original story into something more modern in terms of the police interrogation and it being in a city atmosphere. I also thought that it was interesting that you chose to keep the fox alive "at least so far" so that you could actually incorporate the interrogation into the story and let us see what the fox has to say for himself!
Overall, I think that your storybook idea is very fun and creative and was very fun for me to read! I love that you are keeping true to the black and white images as well!
I LOVE your picture on the main page. Foxes are my favorite animal of ever. I also really like your introduction. I like that you start out with a joke, but then you blatantly end it with a serious note. I liked your reference to popular movies like Lion King and Wizard of Oz, I thought those were really clever. Your dog in the introduction reminds me of a story of a dog acting as sheriff, I think, from when I was much younger, but I can’t remember what it was called. I think his name was Hank? I like the picture of Bern, I thought it really showed the character you described as far as the seriousness and cool demeanor. It also gave a crime-fighting, serious, mysterious feel to the stories following and the character of Bern. I like your use of simile and descriptions. Your description of Aesop kind of reminded me of Gotham city prior to Batman, if that makes sense. Especially when you say that the true king is the lion (crime) just like in Gotham. The “sit” line from Bern and the rebuttle from Reynard made me laugh. I really liked that. I can’t wait to hear what happened and see if the fox survives his encounter!
ReplyDeleteI love the entire setup of your site! The grey tones makes this so relaxing and the image you chose is very sweet. I think upon first inspection, you have really brought together a nice color scheme. Your introduction is very well written and I love that you started it off the way you did with the joke. I feel as if you really capture our attention that way and it made it possible for you to lighten the mood a little bit despite the introduction being very serious. I can just imagine this big dog being the main character too! I love the fox's character development in your first story. The police investigation helps continue your introduction in a good direction and I really think you have used a lot of creativity in your storybook! I can tell you have put a lot of thought into this story because the author's note helps us understand that you have twisted the original and kept the fox alive! I think having a survivor really helps the development of the investigation.
ReplyDeleteI feel as if the Fox could be developed into an even more smart aleck type character in his responses. Overall, I loved this story and I am really looking forward to coming back to see what else you have in store for us!
Cody, great job on your storybook so far! My first impression of the grayscale theme was that it gave the site an old-timey kind of feel, but as I started reading, I also got a gloomy sense about it too. Your color scheme choice does a lot to emphasize the underlying darkness in this city of animals and highlights the parts of this town that aren't all "giggles and funnies."
ReplyDeleteIn terms of your writing, I was very impressed. You gave just the right amount of background for the reader to know what's happening, but not so much that it is overbearing--there are still aspects that are open to interpretation. Your intro provided just enough of a cliffhanger to make me excited to read more. In your first story, I loved the way that you changed the fable to fit this modern setting while keeping the crucial details. You also constructed the banter between the fox and the dog in a smart way--the character development of both the tough sheriff and the sly fox are coming along nicely. One thing I did think, however, was that this chapter ended pretty abruptly. I also wondered if you were going to add the morals of the original fables to the end of each chapter—perhaps this would provide either a smooth transition into the next story or a more conclusive ending.
Overall, great job so far! I can’t wait to come back and read more of your work.
Wow! Your introduction was really good! The narrative flowed well and the narrator was interesting, describing the world in which the characters live in. And he (I’m assuming it’s a he) did a great job of giving a lot of information about the world without awkwardly forcing the information on the reader. He seemed like the type of character who knows everything about everything going on in the town. By the way, I think the concept of the city of Aesop is awesome. It’s really unique, and allows you to do a lot with your storybook. As for your writing in general, I like the style. Not only does it sound natural, it’s also funny, what with the narrator’s sarcasm.
ReplyDeleteAs for your first story, I thought it was awesome! You have so much detail (but definitely not in a bad, purple prose sort of way), which made it easy to visualize the scene playing out in front of me. And I like how even in a fairly serious situation, you manage to inject your humor into the story. As in the introduction, the writing flows well and the dialogue is organic. I had no idea how the story was going to play out – I thought that the fox committed the crime and was going to get arrested until he revealed the lion killed the donkey.
Anyways, I think you did a great job overall! Can’t wait to check out your later stories!
Hi Cody, I have yet to visit your storybook this semester. I loved the black and white color scheme on your home page. I have read another classmates storybook over the Tales of Aesop so I was interested to see how you delivered your stories. Your introduction was a lot different than I thought. I was not sure what to expect but your introduction was very intense! I think it is neat that you have a dog as the sheriff ruling over the lions and other animals. Your first story, “A Trip to the Pound” was just as intense as the introduction. I was on edge the whole time wondering what the fox was going to say about the murder. It’s an interesting plot that the Lion has an underlying authority with the animals of the city. I like that the black and white theme continues throughout the storybook and that all of the pictures are also in black and white. It really has a true feel of a murder mystery movie with the language used and the color. Great job on portraying such a deep theme and I am looking forward to reading more stories in your storybook to see what happens to the fox!
ReplyDeleteCody,
ReplyDeleteFirst off, I have to say that I am really impressed with the set up and layout of your cover page! It works perfectly with your title, and I cannot wait to being reading the introduction and first tale.
So maybe I have been watching way too much television lately, but the sort of vibe that your narrator has set up kind of reminds me of the rough-and-tough layout of Gotham, on the show Gotham of course haha. This makes me all the more intrigued to learn more of Sheriff Bern, and his interactions with the animals in the city of Aesop. Growing up I have always loved reading mysteries, and the way your story is written really pulls me in as a reader all while keeping me in anticipation to what's going to happen next.
After reading all of your first story, I have to applaud you for all your creativity that you have implemented! I cannot wait to come back and read more of your stories, and wonder whether Sheriff Bern is able to catch and bring down Lion. The fact that you were able to turn a simple fable into a murder mystery is just simply amazing! Great job so far!
I'm already in love with your storybook. Maybe I'm way ahead of myself, but the introduction is written in such a way that I imagined jazz and a deep voice. This may be my favorite line of any storybook: "no Chihuahua was going to be telling the tiger who he can and who he can’t eat for dinner, if you catch my drift." I think I'm gushing too much here.
ReplyDeleteThis very much reminds me of the comic Fables. It makes me want to know more about the city of Aesop. Do humans live in surrounding cities? Do humans know about the city? Do humans even exist in this world you've created? As much as I want to know these things, the mystery surrounding it is really fun too. It definitely gives off a more surreal vibe when you don’t mention humans.
As far as the layout goes, I think you did a fantastic job. I was confused at first when I got to your cover page. I thought a storybook about Aesop’s fables would be more vibrant and childish. But once I read the introduction, I realized how perfect it is. Your writing is also excellent! I didn’t find any typos or weird spots. Everything is clear and cleverly written. I’m definitely going to be back to read the second story!
Cody,
ReplyDeleteFor starters, I love your introduction. Your "Wizard of Oz" and "Lion King" references are priceless! I also think it is really clever to name it town Aesop. Bernie sounds like a really interesting character! Definitely a better sounding cop dog than your average chihuahua. I would like to know some back ground on him! What made him such a hard cop? I really love your writing style! You brought me right into the story and I loved it.
I was shocked to hear that the fox was in trouble for murder! I thought they were traditionally tricksters in Aesop's fables, not a cold blooded killer! I was glad to hear that he did not kill the Donkey. Your description of the police station was pretty good as well. I am glad you made it kind of run down, it definitely seems to fit better into your story than a newer one would. However, now I would really like to know what despair smells like. Your interrogation scene was really great. I have seen plenty of investigative tv shows and that seemed pretty spot on! I absolutely love what you have done with your storybook! One of my favorites so far! I would love to come by and see what you have done with it later this semester!
Hi again Cody,
ReplyDeleteFantastic job with your first story, it is one of the coolest transformations of the source material into a storybook I have seen so far from the internet reading assignments. You made this story much more memorable the way you added a substantial amount of depth and plot to the pretty plain source material. Your characters are also very well written. I was concerned last time that your introduction did not develop your characters and left the reader confused but the back story you put forward makes them very well-rounded characters. I also like how you made the story feel connected. If I remember correctly from reading the Aesop section that the stories are all not really connected but your telling has a very good flow to it and I can not wait to see how you tie in your next story.
I also did not mention it last time I commented but your choice of theme and background also does your story justice because it accentuates the dark, gritty feel that you are going for in your story. I like how the background pic looks like a gritty old New York mobster movie from the forties.
Hey Cody! I remember looking at your storybook when it was still only a cover page and an introduction and was very impressed with your direction! Because of that, I was excited to have the opportunity to revisit your storybook this week and see how it has progressed. Unfortunately, I was a little disappointed to only find one story to read this week!
ReplyDeleteFor your story I thought that you do an excellent job of depicting each of your character's personalities! I love that you really expanded on the relationship between the dog and the fox from the original story in way that was very entertaining and kept me wandering what was going to happen next. I think that your storybook is very imaginative and has a great writing style that flows well and is easy to follow along with! I hope that you get the chance to squeeze in a few more stories for me to read before the semester is up!
Cody, thanks for reading my storybook for a second time and letting me know what you liked about the stories. Quoting your favorite Doctor line showed me that I was doing a good job when coming up with odd, clever things for him to say in the stories. Thank you!
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